Obsession

a mostly unedited personal piece by Anonymous


 

Obsessive. According to Google, obsessing is filling the mind of (someone) continually, intrusively, and to a troubling extent. This being a characteristic within each and every person, those containing this characteristic have their own specific obsession. With the definition of this characteristic would you draw the conclusion that those who are obsessed with a certain person are considered a stalker? Not only do celebrities have obsessive stalkers, any individual in the world could lurk around in magazines or on social media, then printed out, whilst dicing the photo only containing the certain person. Those lurkers collect those photos as if they are trading cards. Displaying their collected scrap photos along a wall to showcase their shrine among others. Stalkers would go above and beyond just to proclaim their love or desire for that specific person, regardless of whether that person even acknowledges them. Numerous fans of celebrities anticipate that they are married to their favorite celebrity. Most of which even track their proclaimed love address whilst mailing out numerous emails and mail as if they were attempting to conceive an actual conversation. However, who am I to say that I do not have this stalker characteristic? Who am I to say I would not go above and beyond while exceeding boundaries for a person that may or may not feel the same way as you do for them?

Supposedly an estimated 15 percent of women and 6 percent of men have been a victim of stalking throughout their lifetime. Those who had been a victim could have been any person regardless of career, race, religion, creed, or sexual orientation. A teacher that communicates with multiple students throughout their career is exposed to the eagerness and greed from students. A particular teacher experienced such an incident among one of his former students during the early months of the school year. This teacher may have dealt with beyond fifty students during the duration of the school year and all of which will lead to multiple paths along their lifetime. He was assigned a certain class with numerous students, one of which he will later discover is his pertained stalker. A student that he had for less than a semester; who would later be moved to another state, miles upon miles away. As years come along, way beyond the graduation of this girl, he received a precise email originating from this student through his “school developed” email. A school email that contained the teacher’s first, including their last name along with the area of where the school is. How might have the stalker obtained or commemorate his name and area? The emails seemed quite casual but would later develop into sensitive and out of the box emails regarding the government and society. At first, he had no regards as to who this person is until he unfolds his aged files revealing she was a former student of his. Emails that contained information regarding self-harm, conspiracies, and much more out of the ordinary controversial topics that may be deemed too sensitive to particular people. Could this have been a cry for help? Even if, why was it targeted toward a teacher that the student had for less than three months? Topics that would gradually become too off-topic and sensitive that the state police from the stalker had been contacted by the teacher. How can a story so surreal and so out of the norm be unrealistic and fake?

Am I just a worrisome person that desires the greed and the need for obtaining attention upon another person? Do I value company from other people rather than sustaining my personal space whilst not being given the opportunity due to my race, religion, or sexual orientation? Do I purposely limit others personal life by continuously messaging them, so I may get the benefit of the doubt from collecting each and every “attention bubble,” I can obtain from the dozens of people that know who I am? Could obsession be a characteristic that is portrayed mainly as a negative or positive outlook? Is it negatively impactful because you are initially following someone or is it more directed towards positivity due to a person spending a majority of their time focusing on you, appreciating your presents and company along with your daily activities? Maybe this is all in my head. Maybe he’s busy. He participates in another school’s marching band; a film student wanting to be an upcoming videographer; a photographer wanting to grow into becoming a well-developed photographer while developing their own style. The ideal dream for me with matching likes and hobbies; dreamy eyes, those dreamy green eyes that glisten with the typical and overused Snapchat cat filter that displays cat ears on your head along with a black nose with a mask that would cover the lower half of his face. Video game nerd; cartoon fanatic; creative drawing, writing, and use of technology. The commonalities he and I share seems almost too surreal to be true. With words saying regardless of the distance he will appreciate me, along with the presence of loyalty and trust leading up to each day we meet. Is this too good to be true? Was this gift from God going to lead to consequences? Am I not his ideal boy as he is for me? Am I too stale or annoying for him, providing him with numerous texts invading his personal space? He claims that he loves me, as well as he enjoys conversing with me, but am I overprotective not allowing him to sustain personal space? Even among all ages, may there be a lurker among them, obsessed with their daily movement. It can occur from the day you are born to the day you are buried six feet under. Regardless of their age, the act of vulnerability increases whilst awareness is lowered. Why is it that people of all ages can let their immediate guard down in a heartbeat? Not even for a second, a person, of any kind, could be considered comfortable to talk to, whilst allowing yourself to express their deep, darkest secrets with them. It’s nearly unlikely to encounter that certain person that would snake their way through your life and expose you on the long run. Obsession is within each and every person, regardless of who they are.


 

Boredom in one of my classes inspired me to write this piece. What also inspired me was constant isolation and being ignored by many, also being left on-read via messages. I wrote this piece for people to be more aware of who they talk to and trust. Regardless of who a person is, they may be watching your every movement. The concept of writing about this boy in the third paragraph was to show irony that even I, the writer expressing awareness about obsession, have emotions towards another leading me to think about them constantly. The anecdote regarding the teacher was meant to show that lurkers and stalkers can be people of all kinds regardless of their race, religion, creed or sexual orientation.

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